Are You a Genius?
Take this Handy Quiz to Find Out.
- What best describes your relationship to school?
- I am a child prodigy and attract widespread envy
- My teachers think I’m slow
- School? I gave up on that a long time ago
- My university named an institute after me
- What best describes your personal sense of style?
- I am particularly fond of my derby hat and silk handkerchiefs
- I dress completely in white whenever I appear in public
- I enjoy dressing up like a sailor
- I sleep in my clothes
- Which sentence best describes your relationship with the
opposite sex:- The more the merrier
- Buy one, get one free
- I want to be alone
- The course of true love never did run smooth
- How would you describe your social skills?
- Go away
- I like people, but only when I’m drinking
- I can only meet with one person at a time
- I’ve never been accused of diplomacy
- If you could only have one food for, say, two years, it would be:
- Milk
- Nabisco crackers
- Rancid butter
- Water
- Which statement best describes your ideal working conditions:
- Dark, shuttered rooms
- The cave underneath my house
- I must be surrounded by absolute luxury or I can’t produce
- Hot, hot, hot airless rooms
- How far are you willing to go for your art/science?
- I would tie myself to a ship’s mast during a storm to get a great painting
- I would send electricity through my body to demonstrate its effects
- I would infect myself with venereal disease to see if I could cure it
- I would spend my own money to publish my book
Congratulations! Regardless of whether you chose A, B, C, or D, you are clearly a genius since you gave the same answer as one of history’s recorded geniuses. Or at least, the answer they would have given if they had taken this quiz and were still alive. Which they didn’t and they are not.
Answer Key: 1. a. Mozart b. Einstein c. The Wright Brothers d. Niels Bohr 2. a. Nikola Tesla b. Mark Twain c. Architect A.W.N. Pugin d. Isaac Newton 3. a. Biographer James Boswell b. Rembrandt c. Henry Cavendish, discoverer of hydrogen d. William Makepeace Thackeray 4. a. Joseph Turner b. 70% of all Nobel Prize winners in Literature c. Jeremy Bentham, English jurist and social reformer d. Frank Lloyd Wright 5. a. Thomas Edison b. Tesla c. Samuel Johnson d. Howard Hughes 6. a. Tesla again b. William Harvey, discoverer of the circulatory system c. Richard Wagner d. Oliver Heaviside, mathematician, physicist and engineer 7. a. Turner b. Tesla c. John Hunter, the “father of modern surgery” d. Henry David Thoreau
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